Past the Obvious
by Moonys Mistress
Summary: the war against voldemort is over but so many people have been lost. a girl from durmstrang has come to teach potions...will everyone be able to look past the obvious or will she be shunned?


Chapter One:

The Staff Meeting

Minerva McGonagall stood up and looked at the remainder of the staff. The war against Voldemort had finally ended but it had taken much with it. So many had died and she now faced the task of replacing them. Albus Dumbledore, Severus Snape, Professor Sprout, Madam Hooch, Sibyl Trelawney, and countless Defense Against the Dark Arts instructors had been lost. Professor Flitwick had retired before the war and Bill Weasley had taken his place. Looking around she blinked back tears. This meeting was being held to enlighten the remainder of the staff of her replacements.

"I have finally chosen replacements for those we have lost," she said trying to hold back her tears. "Taking Hagrid's place until he feels well enough to return will be Charlie Weasley. Lavender Brown will take over Divinations, and Defense Against the Dark Arts shall be instructed by Remus Lupin,"

"Are you sure that's wise Minerva?" Professor Weber asked cautiously. She was the History of Magic instructor.

"Yes. Had it not been for Remus I would not be standing here today," she said angrily. "Don't you think it's time that you opened your mind? Albus trusted him," Mentioning Dumbledore's name made the room go silent. It was hard for them to imagine that he was actually gone. After a moment she continued, "Neville Longbottom will be joining our staff as our new Herbology Professor and Harry Potter will take over flying classes," she said with a small smile.

"Why flying classes?"

"It was his request," Minerva said with a shrug.

"A wise decision," Bill said with a solemn nod.

"Who's going to be taking over Transfigurations?"

"Sirius Black," Minerva said shortly. The room remained quiet. Now that Voldemort had been destroyed it was obvious that Sirius was innocent. Minerva closed her eyes remembering how every Death Eater around her had died the instant Voldemort did. She shuddered, would the memories of that dreadful night ever go away?

"Who will be taking Severus' place?" she heard a familiar voice ask. Looking up she noticed that both Sirius Black and Remus Lupin had joined them. Smiling briefly she entertained the question.

"Severus was planning on retiring," Minerva began, "and he left Albus with a recommendation…I have decided to honor that recommendation and hire a young lady that graduated from Durmstrang."

"Are you serious!? Those people are only versed in the evils of magic!" Professor Nickelson, the Muggle Studies instructor, shouted. Minerva raised her hand to silence him.

"Severus trusted her and I trust his judgment,"

"You trust the judgment of a Death Eater," someone in the back of the room mumbled.

"I have had enough of this!" she shouted. "I know that I'm not Albus, and you all think I will never live up to his name but I am the Headmistress now and if you do not like my decisions then you can go, I will find someone to replace you as well,"

"I think you need to back off and let Minerva do her job," Sirius added. He had noticed that everyone seemed to be ganging up on her. Did they not realize that she lost something too?

"What's her name?" Remus inquired. "Where's she from?"

"Her name is Natasha Frost," Minerva said. "She, believe it or not, is originally from America. Her parents used to travel quiet extensively, they decided that she would attend Durmstrang,"

"When will she be arriving?" Bill inquired.

"Where will she be arriving from?" Sirius asked. Minerva smiled.

"She's arriving from America. She should be here, I hope the poor dear didn't get lost,"

**~**~**~**~**~**

Chapter Two:

Lost and Found

Natasha Frost landed her broom in the center of Hogsmeade. She carried with her a simple duffle bag and looked around. She was sure that she could find Hogwarts alone but now she was lost. She wondered if anyone would help her. Walking cautiously down the road she came to The Three Broomsticks. As she pushed the door open everyone stopped and stared at her.

"Excuse me," she said trying to disguise what was left of her accent. "Can you tell me where to find Hogwarts school of Witchcraft and Wizardry?"

"Why do you want to know?" a squat old man said angrily from behind the counter. "You want to start trouble there or something?"

"No, of course not!" Natasha said. "I've been hired as the Potions Mistress," she pulled a piece of parchment from her bag and showed it to the man whose expression softened.

"I'm sorry miss," he said.

"It's all right," She said with a small smile. "I should have asked for an escort or something,"

The bartender was about to say something when he looked over Natasha's shoulder. "You wanted an escort and here come two," he said with a chuckle.

**~**~**~**~**~**

Having finished the staff meeting Remus and Sirius decided that a quick trip to Hogsmeade was in order.

"We can relax without everyone watching us," Sirius said as they hopped into a carriage.

"They didn't look too happy to see us," Remus added. They rode in silence and exited the carriage in front of The Three Broomsticks. They had no sooner entered than the bartender waved them toward him. He was talking to a girl of medium build and height. She had shoulder length light brown hair and captivating hazel eyes. "This girl here's your new Potions lady," he said.

"You're Natasha Frost?" Remus asked. She nodded and he extended a hand. "Remus Lupin, I'm teaching Defense this year," he said.

"How do you do," was all she could manage to say. He had long brown hair and amazing gray eyes. She found herself having trouble tearing her gaze away but she finally managed to look at the man to Remus' left. He too was tall with brown eyes and long black hair.

"I'm Sirius Black," he said. She shook his hand as well.

"What will you be instructing this term?" she asked Sirius. She was trying very hard not to look over at Remus who stood quietly beside Sirius.

"Transfigurations,"

"Oh, I see." She said. "I'm glad the two of you showed up, I'm a bit lost."

"So we guessed," Sirius said smiling at her. "Not to worry, Moony and I will show you the way,"

"Moony?" she questioned.

"An old childhood nickname," he said quickly.

"I see," she said. She began to study him noticing that he looked very sick and his robes were old and tattered.

"Let's get Natasha to the school," Remus said after a moment of silence. "I'm sure she'd like to get settled in," he forced a smile. They led Natasha to the carriage and helped her inside.

**~**~**~**~**~**

Chapter Three:

Broken Promises

Natasha was excited, nervous, and frightened all at once. She knew that some of the people here would not take to her once they found out where she came from; they would probably hate her more if they knew about her family. She gazed out the window and began to daydream.

"Natasha?" she heard Sirius say.

"Yes? Oh I'm sorry, did you say something?" she asked.

"I just asked if you had any family around here," Sirius said.

"Family? No. No they are all…gone," she said. "The only family I have left is Sev, I can't wait to see him again,"

"Sev?" Remus asked raising an eyebrow.

"Yes, Severus, the Potions Master…well, the soon-to-be retired Potions Master," Natasha said. "It's been so long since I've seen him,"

"How are _you related to __Snape?" Sirius asked in confusion._

"I'm sort of a half-sister," she said. "My mum and dad died when I was young and the Snape's owed my family a favor so they took care of me…he's a lot older than I, but we got along well."

"Natasha, when was the last time you heard from him?" Remus asked.

"It's been a long time I admit but that's my fault…we had a system, don't send another letter until your letter has been replied to…the last one I got from him was the one that told me he was planning on retiring,"

"That was how long ago?"

"Oh wow," she said thinking hard. She pulled a battered piece of parchment from her bag and looked at the date. "It's been almost a year now," she said with a frown.

"Then you don't know," Remus whispered.

"Know what?" she asked. She had a bad feeling and her stomach fell. Had something happened to Severus?

"About the war…about Voldemort," Sirius said solemnly.

"He mentioned it but he promised that there was nothing to worry about, that he was fine," She said in panic. "What's happened? What's wrong?"

"Natasha," Remus began gently. "Severus…was a Death Eater. When Voldemort died, all of the Death Eaters around him died with him. Severus is dead."

"What?" Natasha said tears stinging her now black eyes. "No, no it can't be. He promised me,"

"He promised you what?"

"He promised me that he'd never join Voldemort's side…he swore it! There must be some mistake,"

"Natasha," Sirius began as he placed a comforting hand on her shoulder. She shrugged it off just as the carriage stopped. Angry and confused she jumped from the carriage and tore across the grounds.

**~**~**~**~**~**

Minerva watched the carriage stop and expected to see Remus and Sirius jump out of it. Instead she saw a small girl with light brown hair jump from the carriage running blindly. Remus and Sirius jumped out behind her and ran after her.

"Natasha!" she heard Remus scream as he ran. The girl did not stop and Minerva realized that she was Natasha Frost. Realizing that Remus or Sirius must have told her the news of Severus' death she walked into her office. Pulling a sealed envelope from her desk she and walked over to the window and watched the girl run realizing that she would end up at the lake. Taking a deep breath that's where Minerva headed.

**~**~**~**~**~**

Natasha ran blindly through the grass. She didn't know where she was or where she was running but she felt that she had to run. To escape. What Remus and Sirius told her couldn't possibly be true. Severus was not dead. Severus was not a Death Eater. He promised her, she remembered it so clearly. It was the day before she was to go off to Durmstrang.

"Sev, I'm scared," Natasha said to Severus as they walked through the garden that was behind the house.

_"Why are you scared Tasha?" he asked her. _

_"I'm going to go away…so far away from home, and you won't be there to protect me," she said. _

_"You can write lots of letters," _

_"What if your mom dies while I'm gone? Who will be here to help you?" _

_"I'll be okay." _

_"Sev I'm scared for you. You're always by yourself, you won't become one of **them** will you?" _

_"What do you mean?" Severus asked. He paused and looked at the small girl. She looked afraid and alone. _

_"I heard your mum talking in her sleep…she said that Voldemort is growing and has followers now," Natasha paused and her hazel eyes turned a shade of dark green. "You won't follow him will you? She told me awful stories about him!" _

_"Natasha you really shouldn't pay much attention to her," he said as he methodically placed his arm behind his back. "Voldemort was an evil wizard, but he's gone now," _

_"What if he comes back?" _

_"He won't," _

_"You don't know that…just because he's gone doesn't mean he's dead." Severus said nothing and Natasha continued. "Promise me you won't follow him," she pleaded. _

_"I promise," he said. She methodically stuck out her pinkie and he hooked hers with his. She was a child after all he must humor her. _

_"Okay, now tell me about Hogwarts…" she said. _

She felt her legs buckle under her just as she reached the lake. She tumbled to the ground in front of a large stone. She looked up to see that there were several stones there.

"Albus Dumbledore, Beloved Headmaster," she read aloud. Almost involuntarily her eyes drifted to the next stone. Her breath caught in her throat. No. No, it couldn't be, her eyes were playing tricks on her. "Oh God no!" she croaked as she began to sob. She again looked at the stone, which read, "Severus Snape, Potions Master,"

**~**~**~**~**~**

Remus and Sirius stopped in mid step when Natasha collapsed in front of the gravestones. Burying the staff members who had so bravely fought Voldemort on Hogwarts grounds had been Minerva's idea. When Natasha spotted Severus' marker she began to sob burying her head in her hands.

"You _Promised!" she screamed at the stone. "You swore Sev, you swore!" she shouted. Sirius and Remus could do no more than stand and watch. They too felt like crying, not because they missed Severus but because this girl did._

"Which one of you told her?" they heard Minerva ask. She walked up behind them and looked solemnly at Natasha.

"I did," Remus said. "She had no idea. She thought he'd be here to greet her,"

"You knew?" Sirius asked.

"I did," Minerva said. She pulled the letter from her robes and gave it to Remus. "Give this to her, it's from Severus," having said that Minerva walked back toward the castle leaving Sirius and Remus to ponder what to do next.

**~**~**~**~**~**

Chapter Four:

Forgive me

Natasha felt as if she had cried for an eternity. She was vaguely aware that Remus and Sirius were watching her but didn't care. The only person she had left had died. What was she to do now?

"Natasha?" Remus said cautiously, kneeling beside her. "Are you going to be all right?"

She wiped her eyes and looked at him. Nodding numbly she spotted the letter in his hand. "What's that?"

"It's for you. It was left for you by Severus," he said handing her the envelope. She opened it to find a small piece of parchment and an old skeleton key. She opened the letter.

_Natasha, _

_There is so much that I need to tell you but I haven't the time. I am not going to tell you why for I am sure you will know but I need to ask your forgiveness. Only when I have that can I rest peacefully. I broke a promise to you and I now fear I will pay with my life. If you are reading this then I am gone. Enclosed is they key to a place you held dear to you when you were small, you know the way. All I have is now yours. Live well, be free. _

_Severus _

Natasha held the small antique key in her hand and smiled. She knew exactly what it opened. Rising from her spot on the ground she looked at Severus' stone. "Of course I forgive you," she whispered. Blinking back fresh tears she turned to Sirius and Remus. "Can you show me to Severus' quarters?"

**~**~**~**~**~**

Chapter Five:

So alone

"Snape's quarters? Why do you want to go there?" Sirius asked.

"Because they are now _my quarters," she said._

"Maybe we should take you to Minerva first," Remus said.

"Is she the Headmistress?"

"Yes," Remus said with a nod.

"Very well," Natasha said. She followed Remus and Sirius in silence to Minerva's office. She knocked and was bid entrance from the voice behind the door. Taking a deep breath she stepped inside.

**~**~**~**~**~**

Minerva wondered if Natasha had read the letter from Severus. Just as she was about to rise from her seat she heard a hesitant knock on the door.

"Come in," she said sitting back in her chair. Natasha entered followed by Sirius and Remus.

"Natasha, welcome," Minerva said.

"Hello," Natasha said sitting in the nearest chair. "I would like to request living in Severus' quarters. He has left everything to me," she said quickly. "I hope it hasn't been packed up or anything,"

"No dear everything is the way he left it. I can't bring myself to walk into any of the rooms," Minerva said. Natasha handed her the letter and Minerva read it, tears forming in her eyes.

"So, it's okay that I…use his room?" Natasha asked. Minerva nodded. Natasha smiled. "Is there anything you require of me then?" she asked.

"No."

"Very well, I would like to be shown my room then,"

Minerva started to rise but Sirius stopped her. "You look tired Minerva. We can show her around," Minerva nodded in appreciation and Natasha followed Remus and Sirius out the door.

**~**~**~**~**~**

Remus and Sirius walked in silence. They were unsure of what to say to Natasha. Finally after what seemed to be an eternity they reached Severus' quarters, which were in the dungeons. The large oak door that led to his living quarters already had cobwebs over it. Natasha brushed them away and pushed the door open. It was dark and she blinked trying to adjust her eyes. She noticed a chess game in the corner of the room, which looked as if it had not been played in years. A single armchair sat in front of the fireplace. Pulling her wand from her robes she lit the fireplace and the nearby candles. Nothing but books lined the walls and a single picture of her sat on the mantle. She ventured into the bedchamber to discover that it too looked unlived in. A large antique bed occupied the far wall, and the only other furniture in the room was a free standing oval mirror, a bedside table, and a wardrobe. Volumes of books lined these walls too but potions and potion ingredients accompanied them.

"He was so alone," Natasha said.

**~**~**~**~**~**

Chapter Six:

Secrets Revealed

"Would you guys mind leaving me alone for a while?" she asked turning to Remus and Sirius. Both shook their heads in agreement and left the room. Natasha walked them to the door, shutting it tightly behind them. She lit the rest of the candles and looked around the room. She smiled when she noticed that one of the shelves in the bedroom was devoted to everything she had given Severus for Christmas. Upon further inspection she discovered that Severus had left his key to his vault at Gringotts on his dresser with another note. Deciding she would read it later she placed the key and letter in a drawer. Taking the small antique key from the envelope she placed it on the silver chain she wore around her neck. She frowned when she realized that the room had no windows but the thought comforted her in a strange way. No one could see her; no one would know what she could do. Throwing her head back and laughing to herself she decided that she would roam the grounds but she wouldn't do it as Natasha.

**~**~**~**~**~**

Remus and Sirius left Natasha's room and headed toward the Great Hall. They found Neville Longbottom sitting alone at the far end of the Gryffindor table surrounded by papers. He looked up and waved at them briefly before returning to his work.

"Lesson plans," Sirius said with a grin. "I'm just going to use Minerva's material…of course, I'll dress it up a bit,"

"Of course," Remus said absentmindedly. They walked until they found themselves standing in front of Sirius' quarters.

"I'm going to bed," he said yawning. "I've got to get up early tomorrow and prepare for the students. That and I promised Harry a mock game of Quidditch," he looked to Remus, who was unusually pale. "Full moon's soon isn't it?" he asked quietly.

"Yeah…at the end of this week," Remus said with a frown.

"Don't you think you should get Natasha to brew your potion?"

"She just got here," Remus said. "I am sure I can do it…"

"No you can't…you're good but you're not that good,"

"I don't want her to know," Remus said indignantly.

"She's going to find out sooner or later, might as well be sooner," Sirius said.

"I still have some left from the last batch Snape brewed, it'll last me,"

"You've got enough for this time, what about next time?" Sirius said. "Stop being so stubborn," Having said this Sirius entered his quarters leaving Remus standing in the hallway. Wide-awake and faced with a difficult task he headed outside to clear his head.

**~**~**~**~**~**

Natasha crept out the door and walked silently down the hall. She briefly entertained the idea of telling Minerva that she was an Animagus but dismissed the notion, if she didn't ask then it wasn't as if she was purposely keeping it from her. She sauntered outside and walked toward the lake. The night air was cool and she found the lake with little difficulty. Crooning her head to one side she heard footsteps coming and hid behind Severus' tombstone.

**~**~**~**~**~**

Remus walked aimlessly and found himself back at the lake. He wondered why he came to this place almost every time he had a problem. Probably because he always talked to Dumbledore or Sirius. He leaned against a nearby tree and began talking aloud in a vain attempt to clear his thoughts.

"How does he expect me to tell her about this?" Remus said. "She's the only one here who thinks I'm a normal person," he paused. "And because she's the Potions Mistress I have to tell her I'm a werewolf. I try to keep it a secret, I don't want to tell anyone that doesn't already know," he stopped when he heard a rustling sound. Rising from his spot he saw a small white kitten emerge from behind one of the tombstones. It looked at the stone, shook its head as if in dismay and began to walk away. Remus took one look at the stone and realized that it was Severus'.

"Natasha?" he questioned. The kitten stopped and turned to look at him. Before Remus could blink Natasha stood before him.

"Now we both know a secret about each other," she said with a small smile.

**~**~**~**~**~**

Chapter Seven:

Someone who will listen

"You're an Animagus," Remus said shaking his head.

"And you're a werewolf," she said quietly.

"And now you know I'm not normal," Remus said shaking his head. "And you won't trust me and you'll avoid me like most people do,"

"No," she said shaking her head. "I won't,"

"Sure you will,"

"Want to know another secret? This one should put you at ease,"

"Sure," Remus said. He and Natasha began to walk around the lake. They found a series of benches and Natasha sat beside Remus.

"My father…was a werewolf," she said slowly. "He was bitten after I was born, I was only little but dad used to make me lock him up every full moon," Natasha paused. "It's my fault he and mom are dead," she sniffed.

"How's it your fault?" Remus found himself asking.

"Well one night I forgot to lock the door, and dad got out…and he bit my mother,"

"Oh."

"When dad realized what he had done he howled at the moon in anger. When he became human again he took a Muggle weapon called a shotgun from a nearby Ranch and he shot mom. Then he shot himself." She looked down at the ground. "So much blood," she muttered. "There was so much blood. It seems as if I'm drawn to them now, to the wolves. When I learned how to become an Animagus, my first form was a wolf cub but I stopped that because people said it was dangerous. My best friend, his name was Aubrey, was a werewolf."

"Wow." Was all Remus could say. "So I guess you understand,"

"I try to understand, no one but you can truly understand what you go through. I could make Wolfsbane in my sleep," she added with a grin. "I would brew it for Aubrey all the time until he…" her voice trailed off and she blinked. "Until he was hit by a death curse." She snorted angrily. "Some wizards will never learn, they are so closed minded, they don't understand,"

"I know," Remus said.

"Yes, I guess you do know," she said. "Sometimes, when I was alone with Aubrey and he was a wolf, I would want him to bite me, so I would know what he went through. I mean, I isolate myself but your type of isolation…it's so different."

Remus looked at Natasha and smiled. She didn't pretend to understand but at the same time she understood more than even he did. Not knowing what to say he looked up at the moon and shivered. How he hated it but at the same time he was so drawn to it.

"I was bitten when I was very small," he found himself tell her. She looked at him and he knew that she was not only _hearing him, she was __listening to him. "My parents tried everything. I wouldn't have been able to attend school had it not been for Albus," he said. "He helped me so much. Sirius and my friends helped me too…they didn't desert me the way I thought they would…but even though they were always with me I always felt alone,"_

"Aubrey used to tell me the same thing," Natasha said wrapping her arms around herself. "He used to tell me he loved me for being with him but at the same time he still felt alone. I used to cry all the time because I couldn't do anything else to help him,"

Natasha and Remus talked until the sun peaked over the horizon. By the end of the night they both felt as if they had known each other for years. Remus noticed that Natasha didn't talk very much, she mainly sat back and listened, offering words of wisdom or reassurance at just the right times. She even walked him back to his quarters. He hugged her tightly.

"Thank you, for listening to me," he said with a smile.

"Any time Moony," she said with a wink. He smiled at the sound of his old nickname. It didn't seem to bother him that she called him by it. He turned to enter his room and she added, "stop by the dungeons later and I'll have that Wolfsbane for you,"

"Thanks," he said with a smile. Yawning he retreated to his quarters hoping Sirius would not wake him until late in the afternoon.

**~**~**~**~**~**

Chapter Eight:

Surprise

Deciding that she didn't need sleep just yet Natasha headed for the dungeons with the intent of making Remus his potion. She grinned when she realized that Severus had arranged all of his ingredients in this lab the way he had in his home. Taking what she needed she began to brew the potion with unnatural ease. Realizing that she was going to have to get some ingredients for the upcoming school year she found a quill and some parchment. Scribbling down what she needed she discovered that Remus' potion was nearly finished. As she stirred it she heard a knock on the door.

"Can I come in?" she heard someone say.

"Sure," she said turning around. Sirius Black stood in the doorway. "What can I do for you Mr. Black?"

"Sirius, please," he said with a smile. "I need to talk to you, but this conversation has to stay between you and I," he said quietly. She looked into his eyes and concentrated. Clearing her mind she let his thoughts into her head.

"What is it?" she asked feigning curiosity. No one except Remus knew about her uncanning ability to read others thoughts and she wanted to keep it that way.

"A friend of mine," he began, "is in need of some Wolfsbane Potion,"

"Oh? You have a friend who is a werewolf?" she asked.

"Yes. Yes I do." Sirius said. He noticed that she was brewing something and wondered if Remus had already come to her. "What's that?"

"Oh nothing, just some Wolfsbane for a friend of mine," she said with a wink. "I'll brew another batch for your friend later this afternoon,"

"You will?"

"Of course, I'm the Potions Mistress aren't I?" she said with a grin. "Has your friend taken any of this yet this week? Maybe you should take him some now,"

"You know, that might not be such a bad idea," Sirius said. Natasha nodded at him in understanding and handed him a goblet full of the potion. He turned to walk out the door.

"Oh, and by the way, tell Remus I said hello," she added. He dropped the goblet and whirled around, a look of confusion on his face.

"You…but how…did he…?"

"Yes I know, the way I found out is simple, yes he told me," she said trying to stifle her laughter. "We ran into each other and we had a discussion,"

"So I guess me trying to sneak around behind his back and get it was unneeded,"

"I guess so,"

"So on that happy and rather embarrassing note I'm going to go see my good pal,"

"Oh let the poor boy sleep," she said. "He was up late,"

"He usually is." Sirius said as he looked at his watch. "Besides, I've got to get to the Quidditch Pitch,"

"Have fun," she said as Sirius ran from the dungeons.

"Well will wonders never cease," he said to himself.

**~**~**~**~**~**

Chapter Nine:

Recovering

Sirius walked onto the Quidditch Pitch and waved at Harry. He was already in the air, circling the field. Upon seeing Sirius he landed and gave him a hug.

"How are you?" Sirius asked him. Harry smiled.

"I'm doing okay," he said solemnly.

"How's Ron?"

"He's…well, he's dealing," Harry shivered. Poor Ron had lost so much. Almost his entire family, with the exception of his brothers Charlie and Bill, and his sister Ginny, had been killed. "He still has nightmares but I guess they will never truly go away,"

"How's Ginny?"

"She's doing okay. She doesn't remember what happened and Neville's doing a very good job of being there for her," Harry said. "Ginny's biggest problem is what happened to Hermione,"

"Is she still alive?"

"Barely. They've got her at St. Mungos… The burns were extremely bad. She keeps screaming that she wants to die," Harry blinked back tears and Sirius hugged him. "I feel so guilty," Harry said suddenly. "Ron lost almost his entire family, Hermione almost died, and what happened to me? Nothing! I come out with a few scratches."

"Harry, it's not your fault," Sirius said soothingly.

"And Dumbledore…" Harry said and he began to sob once more. As he cried he wondered if the tears would ever stop. Just saying his name made Harry's eyes well up with tears. "Is it true that Charlie's going to be taking over Hagrid's job?"

"Just until Hagrid's ready to come back," Sirius said. Harry looked in the direction of Hagrid's hut and remembered that horrible night. The night that had claimed so many lives and souls.

"Have you been to see him?" Harry asked Sirius.

"I have. He just sits in the room…rocking back and forth praying that Hermione will be okay," Sirius said. "Maybe you should go to see him, it might help to see that you didn't die that night,"

"Maybe," Harry said. He was about to say something but a white cat walked across the Quidditch Pitch. It scampered over Harry's feet and wrapped itself around Sirius' ankle.

"I've never seen this cat before," Sirius said as he picked it up. The cat tensed up and then relaxed. He placed it back onto the ground and it ran off in the direction of Hogwarts. A few moments later Natasha came walking toward Sirius and Harry.

"Minerva has decided that we are going to have a formal dinner of sorts," she began looking at Sirius. "To introduce all the new staff members. She thought it would be a good idea. To help ease the pain,"

"Thank you for informing us," Sirius said. Natasha looked from Sirius to Harry and smiled.

"You must be Harry Potter," she said. He nodded.

"How did you guess?" he asked sarcastically.

"The broom… I saw you flying around earlier and figured you must be the new flying instructor,"

"Oh." Harry said in surprise. Natasha smiled, pleased with her performance, and bid the duo farewell. As she walked back toward the castle she heard Harry say, "who was _that?"_

**~**~**~**~**~**

Chapter Ten:

Is it possible?

Natasha walked back into the castle and headed straight to the dungeons. She had managed to bottle most of the Wolfsbane she had brewed earlier that morning and decided if she was going to act hospitable at this dinner then she had better take a nap. Sleep was something she felt was highly overrated. Before she slept she wanted to give Remus the potion. If he started taking it now he should be perfectly fine when the full moon rolled around. When she entered the dungeon she found Remus seated on a stool patiently waiting.

"I was just thinking about you," she said with a smile.

"You were?" he said.

"I was thinking that I had better bring you your potion," she said as she walked over to a shelf and pulled a small bottle from amongst the collection of potions. "I have an interesting and rather humorous story to tell you,"

"Oh?" Remus said raising an eyebrow.

"Yes," Natasha said sitting across from Remus. "It has to do with your friend Sirius,"

"Oh dear," Remus said with a grin as Natasha proceeded to tell him of their encounter earlier that day. "That's Sirius…always looking out for me,"

"I still can't get over how he dropped the goblet and looked at me completely dumbfounded when I asked him to say hello to you for me,"

Remus smiled and began to laugh. He could see the image of Sirius' stunned reaction clearly in his mind. They talked a bit longer and Natasha finally got around to mentioning Minerva's bright idea about a dinner.

"She wants to forget as much as we do," Remus said.

"I don't see the point though," Natasha said shaking her head. "Everyone here seems to know everyone else with the exception of me,"

"Well, Minerva doesn't like exceptions," Remus said. "Besides she's got to prove that she's just a good a judge as Dumbledore was,"

"What's that supposed to mean?" Natasha asked defensively despite the fact that she already knew what it meant.

"Well," Remus began gently.

"She told them I was from Durmstrang and they all flipped," she finished for him.

"In a manner of speaking…not all of them just a select few, but they reacted the same way to me and they all know me,"

"Well I refuse to humor people like that, I will not be going to this dinner,"

"I wasn't planning on going either," Remus said with a shrug. "I know that tension will be high and I don't feel like dealing with it. Not today."

Natasha rose from her seat, as did Remus. She handed him the potion and they stood awkwardly for a moment. "Well," Natasha began, "I think I may go and take a nap,"

"Thanks for the potion," he said.

"Your welcome," Natasha said with a small smile. She watched Remus walk out of the dungeon and then proceeded to her quarters. She dressed for bed humming to herself. She had so many thoughts swirling through her mind. The one that was most apparent was _is it possible?_

**~**~**~**~**~**

Chapter Eleven:

Realizations

The rest of the day went whooshing by and soon it was time for dinner. All of the staff members filed in, talking in hushed whispers. As they took their seats no one failed to notice that both Remus and Natasha were not present.

"She's probably trying to find some way of poisoning all of us," Professor Nickelson mumbled.

"Yeah, and he's probably with her," the Study of Ancient Ruins Professor, an older woman by the name of Samantha Bell said hastily.

Sirius heard these comments and tried to ignore it. He noticed everyone looking to him as if they were waiting for an excuse. Looking to his right he saw Harry and Ron sitting together. Ron looked pale and tired while Harry just looked sad. Harry leaned over Remus' empty seat.

"Where's Lupin?" he whispered.

"Don't know," Sirius said. Everyone looked up at the door when it opened to see Neville and Ginny entering, walking hand in hand. They sat across from Sirius and Ginny smiled faintly.

"How are you?" Ginny asked him.

"I'm okay, how are you doing?" Sirius asked her.

"It takes time," was all she said. Everyone continued to talk, greeting people as they entered. When Bill appeared Harry and Ron moved down a seat so that he could sit next to Ron but still close enough that he could talk to Ginny. Charlie was the last of the group to arrive and he sat beside Ginny giving her a quick hug. A few others asked Sirius where Remus was but Sirius just shrugged. The constant questioning was starting to irritate him. Minerva looked around nervously as if the absence of Remus and Natasha was going to ruin the dinner. She tapped lightly on a glass to call for the staff's attention.

"I would just like to welcome all of you to Hogwarts," she began.

"Where's the girl from Durmstrang?" Professor Nickelson bellowed. "And the wolf? Where are they Minerva?"

"I don't know, in their quarters perhaps?"

"This is just the beginning of their trouble, you never should have hired them," Professor Bell said. Minerva began to stutter a reply but Sirius jumped to his feet, he had taken all he was going to.

"Why don't you people give it up?" he roared. "Don't you realize that they, like you, have lost something too?" Ginny looked to Sirius and nodded encouragingly. "Remus never had anything to begin with really, because of people like you. All you do is you stereotype and take and hurt and you don't give a damn! And Natasha, she's lost the only family she had left. She's not here to hurt anyone! Just because she attended Durmstrang doesn't mean that she's a bad person, it means she's had a different experience."

"Sirius is right," Ron said rising from his seat. "Everyone in this building has lost someone…"

"You have no right to judge that girl," Charlie added.

"Or Remus for that matter," Harry said rising to his feet.

"I'd bet," a quiet Ginny added, "that they didn't come to this dinner because they knew that you had already tried and convicted them…who would want to walk to their own execution?"

"Ginny's right," Neville said squeezing her gently.

"I want to meet this Natasha," Bill added rising from his seat. "But I want to do it where no one can make her feel the need to run away,"

"So in conclusion," Sirius said, "I think…no, I _insist that you leave Minerva and her judgment alone. She may not be Albus but she's doing her best despite all that she's lost. Stop being so selfish and remember that the next time you decide to open your mouth,"_

Having said this Sirius left the Great Hall followed closely thereafter by Harry, Ron, Charlie, Bill, Ginny, and Neville.

"I hope you're happy now that you've managed to ruin what could have been the beginning of their healing," Minerva spat as she too fled the Great Hall.

**~**~**~**~**~**

Chapter Twelve:

Betrayal

After the dinner everyone seemed to be open to the idea of Natasha teaching at Hogwarts. Remus was of course well liked by most of the staff so the school year began well. Remus found himself spending a lot of time with Natasha because he felt that he could talk to her about anything. She would always stop what she was doing to sit and listen to him, she even ended a Potions Class early one afternoon because Remus didn't feel well and she wanted to be sure that he was all right. Every time he thought of her he smiled. She was still denying that Severus was a Death Eater and Remus decided to let it go. If she was okay then he was happy for her. Everything was fine until one cloudy night in early October. Natasha was having trouble sleeping. She dressed for bed and scanned the books on the wall deciding that she would read until she felt drowsy. One book, entitled "Vampires for Dummies," struck Natasha as odd. She had seen them in American Muggle bookshops but had never purchased one. Intrigued she pulled on it but instead of the book coming off the shelf it felt as if it were attached to a spring.

"Oh!" Natasha exclaimed in surprise as the shelf tilted sideways to reveal a small hole. Inside it was an old tattered lock box. She pulled the box from its hiding place and blew the dust off of it. A small nameplate had Severus' name engraved on it along with a strange mark. It was a skull with a snake coming through the eye. Voldemort's mark. Full of fear and fascination she carried the box to her bed. Much to her advantage the lock was not clicked shut and she removed it. A shiver ran down her spine as she opened the box. It was filled with old and torn pieces of parchment and a tattered book. Upon inspection she realized that the pieces of parchment were really letters. They were so old that the ink was faded and almost unreadable. Placing the letters aside she opened the book and realized that it was a yearbook from Severus' last year at Hogwarts. Some of the pages had black pieces of ribbon sticking out of them. Wondering why they were marked she opened the book at each ribbon. Her eyes instantly fell upon the only picture on the page with a bright red circle around it.

"That's Sirius Black!" she exclaimed to herself. She noticed that Severus had scrawled something beside the picture.

_Sent to Azkaban November 1st, 1981. Serves him right, trying to defeat the dark lord._

Natasha could not believe her eyes but the handwriting was without a doubt Severus'. She continued to the next marked page. Again she found a single photo with a red circle around it. She found herself smiling when she realized that it was Remus Lupin. Again something had been written.

Evil Wolf. Can't be trusted. Must be dealt with.

Natasha's breath caught in her throat. She opened the next marked page and found a photo of a man named Peter Pettigrew was circled in red. Beside his picture were the words, "killed November 1, 1981." Natasha trembled as she turned to the next marked page. A single red circle was around James Potter's photo. Beside his photo the words. "Dead. October 30, 1981." Turning to the last marked page she realized that these children were only first years…why would Severus want to pick on them? Her eye automatically drifted to the red circle on the page. It was a picture of Bill Weasley!

Damn Weasel…they are everywhere! Must get rid of all of them.

She slammed the book shut and threw it across the room. When she did something flew out of it. A photo and a letter. She scrambled from the bed and picked them up. She then lifted the yearbook from the floor and a mask fell from it. The mask of a Death Eater. Carrying these things to her bed she turned the photo over and gasped at its contents.

**~**~**~**~**~**

"Aubrey," she whispered as tears began to slide down her cheeks. It was a photo of she and Aubrey walking toward her home. She remembered that summer so well. She had asked if Aubrey could stay with her for the summer and Severus had agreed. That was the summer he was killed. She blinked back tears and read the letter the photo was attached to.

_Severus, _

_It has come to our attention that the child you are caring for does not realize that werewolves cannot be trusted. It is a disgusting display and if you ever plan on introducing her to our elite group then this situation must be handled. I would hate to see harm come to such a beautiful girl with such potential. Send her and the wolf to the small tavern at the edge of the village where he can be dealt with the way we see fit to deal with animals like him. If you do as instructed and there are no interferences no harm will come to the girl. _

_L. Malfoy _

Natasha blinked back tears. Severus had set her and Aubrey up that day. She remembered quite clearly how he had insisted they take a trip to the tavern for dinner, just the two of them. He would meet them later. She remembered how he had held her back when the wizard attacked Aubrey. Now she understood why he had not let her help him. He wanted Aubrey to die. Just like he had wanted to harm Remus and he had ruined so many other lives.

Unable to handle this new information she grabbed the yearbook, letter, and photo and ran in the direction of Remus' quarters.

**~**~**~**~**~**

Chapter Thirteen:

New Development

Remus sat in his favorite armchair reading when a loud yet hesitant knock sounded. Confused he placed his book on the coffee table and went to the door. He opened it to find a red faced and rather upset Natasha standing before him clutching an old book and some parchment.

"Are you busy?" she asked wiping her eyes.

"No, not at all, come in," he said as he ushered her inside. "What happened?"

"Oh god," she said looking at Remus with tear filled eyes. "He lied to me…what's worse…he betray me,"

"Who?"

"Severus!" she exclaimed showing him the photo and letter. "_He set Aubrey up to die, look!" she thrust the letter into Remus' hand. He read it quickly and shook his head in dismay. Leading Natasha into the living room he sat down on the sofa and she sat with him. She handed him the book._

"What's this?" he asked quizzically.

"It's a yearbook. Your picture…and Sirius' picture are in it, and so's Bill's… go ahead and look. They're marked with those horrid black ribbons." Remus did as instructed and could not hide his surprise.

"Where did you find this?" Remus asked.

"In a secret compartment in his quarters…I went to take a book from the shelf and it opened…and I found a lock box with all this stuff in it,"

"I knew he hated us but I never realized it was that bad," he whispered. He placed the yearbook and the photo of Aubrey and Natasha onto the coffee table.

"He…he took Aubrey away from me," she sobbed. Remus wrapped her in a protective hug and held her as she cried. Suddenly enraged she threw the yearbook, the letter, and the photo into the fireplace. "I want to hurt him…but he's dead… and I feel so badly for being happy he's gone," she said between sobs. Again Remus wrapped his arms around her holding her tightly.

"It's okay," he said soothingly. "He made you think he was a good person, you've been betrayed. It's okay to feel hostile,"

"He…he hurt me in the worst way. He knew I cared for Aubrey. He knew that we were close. Aubrey was all I had…besides him."

"Maybe he wanted you to himself," Remus said.

"That selfish prick!" she said angrily. "He just wanted to hurt people. Just because he was alone and miserable he thought everyone should be." Remus said nothing. "I'm glad he's gone. He could have hurt you," she said. Having said that she sat up and looked at Remus with guilt-ridden eyes. "I'm so sorry…"

"Why are you sorry?" he asked softly.

"I shouldn't have…" she began but could not finish.

"You shouldn't have what?" he asked in an almost mute whisper.

"I shouldn't have said that,"

"That you're glad he's gone?" Remus asked.

She shook her head. "That he could have hurt you,"

"Why should you not have said that? Everyone knows he tried very hard to hurt me,"

"I…" Natasha began. Dozens of emotions whirled around in her mind and she felt as if what she was about to say was wrong. She looked into Remus' gray eyes and felt as if she were falling. "I think that I…" she began again but she stopped.

"You think that you…?" Remus pressed raising an eyebrow.

"No. No, I can't…it's crazy, it wouldn't…" she said more to herself than anyone. She rose to her feet and tried to brush past Remus who stood up and gently restrained her.

"What's wrong Natasha?" he asked her gently. Her eyes were a swirl of color and he could almost feel her confusion. "Tasha," he whispered in her ear. His lips were so close to her that she could feel them brushing her skin. "Talk to me,"

"I'm afraid to say it," she said unable to tear away from his gaze. "I don't know how to put it into words,"

"Try," he said. She opened her mouth to speak but no sound came out. She had never felt so vulnerable in her life.

"I have to go," she said suddenly.

"Why are you afraid of me?" he asked in an almost inaudible whisper.

"I'm not afraid of you…I'm afraid of what will happen to you,"

"Nothing is going to happen to me," Remus said. "Natasha, what are you thinking?"

"I think," she began again, tears falling down her face, "that I'm falling in love with you…" Remus took a step back and blinked. "I know I haven't known you long…only for a few weeks but it feels like I've known you for forever." She paused and looked at the ground. "It felt that way when I saw you at Hogsmeade…it's gotten stronger. I…I'm sorry, I should go,"

"Why are you sorry?" he asked. She could see that he was trying very hard not to cry. A single tear slid down his cheek and Natasha brushed it away. Remus smiled and looked at her with a strange expression.

"I don't want to hurt you," Natasha said taking a step toward Remus.

"And I don't want to hurt you," Remus said. He leaned close to her unsure of what he was about to do.

"So let's just stop this…before…we…" she never finished her sentence because Remus leaned closer, wrapped one arm around her waist and the other around the back of her neck. Closing his eyes and pulling her close, he began to kiss her.

**~**~**~**~**~**

Chapter Fourteen:

Involuntary stroll down Memory Lane

Natasha tossed and turned. She wanted to wake up but she couldn't. This dream, these memories were not something she wanted to remember. There Severus stood, talking to her, she was a small child and he frightened her. She noticed however that he was wearing _long sleeves despite the summer weather. She turned her head and the dream advanced to her going away party when she was ten. Again the day was unbearable and he was wearing long sleeves. He would pull them up slightly._

"If you're warm, why don't you go change Sev?"

_"I'm comfortable," he snapped. _

"Fine," she said, obviously hurt. His rough expression softened.

"I'm sorry I snapped at you…I'm just tired," 

Her memory showed her that he even wore long sleeved nightshirts to bed during the summer. It then showed her that day he promised he'd never become a Death Eater. She remembered every movement, every gesture. She realized that he used to place his left arm behind his back a lot…especially when he thought he was in trouble. Then the dream took a frightening turn. Snape Manor dissolved and Natasha was standing in her parents' small cottage on the outskirts of the village. There her father stood, shotgun in hand, standing over her now bleeding but still unconscious mother.

"Daddy, what are you doing?" a nine-year-old Natasha questioned her father. 

_"You left the door open Tasha…I bit her," he said accusingly. _

_"No!" she screamed collapsing to her knees. _

_"Yes I did…she'll be like me. I can't hurt you that way," he said with sorrow filled eyes. _

_"What are you going to do?" _

_"I'm going to…to stop this," _

_"You're going to kill her?" she asked in a shrill voice. _

_"And myself," _

_"No, you don't have to…you can bite me…then we can be a family of wolves!" she said frantically now aware of what he was about to do. _

_"No. No I can't damn you that way. It's okay," he aimed the gun at her mother. " The Snape's will take care of you. You will go to school and you'll be okay. You'll be normal." She shrieked as he pulled the trigger on the shotgun he had stolen from a nearby home. Blood was everywhere. Natasha began to cry. _

_"No daddy don't do this," she sobbed. _

_"Good-bye my little one," he said aiming the gun at himself. "We love you," _

**~**~**~**~**~**

"No!" she screamed as she bolted upright in bed. Her breathing was labored and she was afraid. Remus sat up the moment she screamed and wrapped his arms around her, holding her close to him. She was trembling and grasping him, as you would expect a child to grasp a parent. She began to sob.

"Shh," he said soothingly in her ear. "It's okay,"

"So much blood," she sobbed. "God there was so much blood," Remus cringed at her statement. He gently laid her back down wrapping his arms around her. "Why did I leave the door open?" she sobbed. "If only I had remembered to wake up and lock the damn door!"

"Natasha," Remus said gently. "It's not your fault. You were a small child. That kind of secret should not be left with such a little girl," he ran his hands through her hair in an effort to calm her. She was trembling almost violently and holding onto him as if she were afraid he was going to disappear.

"If it's not my fault then why do I keep having this dream?" she asked him.

"I don't know…do you think it could be because of me…of us?" he suggested.

"What?" Natasha questioned. She rolled over to look at him. Even in the small amount of light she could still see his gray eyes clearly. He was afraid.

"Because you're involved with me. Your mind seems to be reminding you of everyone you've lost…and they've all been like me in one big way,"

"I can't let this happen again," she said. "I let the dreams pull me away from Aubrey…I can't let that happen with you," she said tears rolling down her face.

"It's okay…you can talk to me…we'll work through it," Remus said with a slight smile.

"Are you sure you want to put up with me? It's still early enough for you to change your mind," she said.

"I'm sure," he said kissing her gently. She returned the kiss and snuggled close to him. He held her protectively, running his hand through her soft brown hair. Within minutes she was asleep again.

**~**~**~**~**~**

Chapter Fourteen:

Just one night

Remus lay with a sleeping Natasha in his arms. So much had happened between the two of them in just one night. He smiled when he ran the events through his mind. Yes, he had managed to work up the nerve to kiss her but he never expected her to kiss him back. They sat in front of the fireplace for most of the night wrapped in each other's arms, talking and laughing until Natasha had fallen asleep. He was not yet tired so he placed her in his bedchamber and sat in the living room to read. She had emerged from his room a few hours later apologizing for falling asleep. He told her it was no trouble. He could see by the look in her eyes that she did not want to return to her quarters so he asked her to stay with him. She had used the fireplace to return to her quarters and change into her nightclothes. He laughed to himself as he remembered how he paced his quarters wondering if she was going to come back.

And here he was now, with her in his arms asleep after a violent nightmare about her past. He wondered if seeing the photo of she and Aubrey could have been the trigger or if being romantically involved with a werewolf, after all she had been through was the problem.

**~**~**~**~**~**

Sirius walked toward Remus' quarters. He had not been at breakfast and Sirius wondered what he could be up to. He thought that he was with Natasha, helping her to redecorate her quarters but when he had gone there he got no answer. She too had not been seen yet that day. Finally reaching Remus' quarters he knocked gently on the door. It swung open and a very chipper Remus bid him enter.

"You look awake," Sirius said jokingly. "We missed you at breakfast,"

"Who's 'we?'" Remus asked.

"Ginny, Neville, Charlie, Bill, Harry, and Ron…and myself of course," Sirius said with a grin. "I'm sure Tasha missed you too but she wasn't there to express her unhappiness," Sirius noticed that when he mentioned Natasha Remus' smile broadened. "Okay, talk." He said.

"Huh?" Remus said as if surprised. "What are you talking about?"

"I said Tasha and your face lit up like a Christmas tree," Sirius said. "Did I miss something?"

"No, you didn't miss anything," Remus said. He walked over to his fireplace and pointed at what was left of the yearbook. "Tasha came in here last night in tears," he began. "She found some of Snape's stuff…that was hidden in a compartment in the wall. One of the things she found was a yearbook from our last year here. Snape circled all of our pictures…and wrote the date James died, the day Pettigrew pretended to die, the date you were sent to Azkaban, and next to Bill's picture he said something about exterminating the entire Weasley family."

"What was next to your picture?" Sirius asked.

"Just that I was a wolf and needed to be dealt with," Remus frowned. "And that wasn't all. She had a friend, Aubrey, who was a werewolf too…Snape set him up and had him killed,"

"And she didn't know…" Sirius said with a frown. "Is she okay? I stopped by her room, to see if you were there…I didn't get an answer. Maybe we should go check on her,"

"I don't think that will be necessary,"

"Why's that?" Sirius asked raising an eyebrow.

"Because she's here," Remus said quietly.

**~**~**~**~**~**

Chapter Fifteen:

About time

"She's _here?" Sirius said in disbelief._

"Yep. She's still asleep," Remus said.

"Wait. Hold on. She's _still asleep…as in she __stayed here?"_

"Yes," Remus said sitting in his favorite armchair. 

"Did you sleep on the sofa?" Sirius inquired.

"No."

"You mean to tell me that she…and you…together?" Sirius asked in total disbelief.

"Yes. She and I are together," Remus said in a clearly pleased tone. He smiled at Sirius and jokingly added, "We really need to work on your ability to speak in complete sentences,"

"That's wonderful," Sirius said smiling. "It's about time you found a little sunshine,"

"Thank you,"

"So what happened?" Sirius asked jokingly.

"What do you mean 'what happened?'"

"How did this happen?" Sirius asked. "I mean I realized that you two were getting close but I didn't realize it was this close,"

"Well, Natasha understands me. She's so sweet and wonderful. I love her laugh…whenever she's laughing the entire room seems to light up…and you just want to laugh with her." Sirius sat back and smiled. Remus was in love.

"You're in love," Sirius teased. Remus threw a pillow at him and he caught it. Sirius threw the pillow back and the fight was on. They playfully pelted each other with pillows until they heard a noise from the doorway of Remus' bedchamber.

**~**~**~**~**~**

The sun shone brightly onto Natasha's face. She rolled over and blinked realizing that Remus had already awakened. Rising she pulled her bathrobe over her nightshirt and walked toward the living room. She stopped short when she saw Sirius and Remus in the middle of a pillow fight. She couldn't help but smile. Remus' hair had already been pulled back and he was laughing and smiling like a child. She couldn't get over how happy she felt just looking at him. She cleared her throat loudly and they both stopped in mid swing to look at her.

"Am I interrupting something?" she asked. Both Remus and Sirius placed the pillows behind their backs as if they hoped she hadn't seen what they were doing.

"No." Sirius said quickly, a guilty grin spreading across his face.

"Not at all," Remus added with a smile. He walked over to her and kissed her on the cheek. "How did you sleep?" Remus inquired.

"Nicely thank you," she said with a smile. She realized that Remus had told Sirius of their becoming involved and it made her even happier. She and Remus sat on the sofa while Sirius claimed Remus' armchair. She leaned her head on Remus' shoulder and he wrapped his arms around her waist. "This is a Kodak moment," Natasha said after a minute.

"A what?" Sirius asked.

"A Kodak moment. It means that I wish I had a camera so someone could get a picture of it…it's a Muggle thing,"

"It's a cute moment," Remus said.

"I got it, I got the concept," Sirius said sarcastically. The trio sat in silence for a few moments and Sirius rose to leave.

"Well now that I know you two are safe and sound I'm going to go," he said. Remus walked him to the door and winked at him. "Well done, well done."

"You're disturbed," Remus said shaking his head.

**~**~**~**~**~**

Chapter Sixteen:

Guilty

Natasha sat on the sofa and watched Remus walk to the door with Sirius. As soon as he was out of sight a small voice in the back of her head sounded.

_You shouldn't be doing this Natasha. He's a werewolf. This isn't going to work. You know it. She shook her head to clear it but the relentless voice continued. __If you get involved with him something will happen to him. Look at your parents…you were there only child and they trusted you and they are dead because you couldn't lock a door. She closed her eyes tightly and she wanted to scream. __Look at poor, sweet Aubrey. You cared for him…you were just his friend and he was killed…what do you think will happen to poor Remus? He'll end up dead too. Something will happen to him…back off now…run away. Tell him that you don't want to be with him. "No," she whispered to herself. It was not her fault that Aubrey was dead. She did everything she could to help him. It was Severus' fault. __You can't let yourself get hurt like this. What if he doesn't love you the way he says he does? Just as she was about to scream and run from the room Remus appeared beside her. Looking into his eyes made her realize that the small nagging voice in her mind was wrong._

"You okay?" he asked. He looked into her eyes and noticed how cold they had become.

"Yes, I'm fine." She said. She wrapped her arms around him and hugged him tightly. She felt so confused. So guilty. She didn't want to hurt Remus. She had never felt this strongly for someone, not even Aubrey. What was she to do?

**~**~**~**~**~**

Chapter Seventeen:

She's lost that Loving Feeling

The news of Remus and Natasha's involvement had circulated through the school before the end of the weekend. Sirius was happy for the both of them as was Harry, Ron, Ginny, Neville, Charlie, and Bill.

"They were made for each other," Professor Bell snorted one day. "Neither one of them can be trusted,"

"I don't know," Professor Weber said with a smile. "Remus has never really given any of us reason to distrust him and Natasha…well she's a very nice girl. I think they deserve to be happy,"

"Oh get off it Rebecca," Nickelson snapped.

"Leave her alone," Lavender Brown said in exasperation. "I have a terrible migraine headache and you bickering over something this superficial is making it worse,"

Minerva put an end to this discussion by making an announcement. "Halloween is but a week away. I thought that we would try a Halloween ball this year…everyone will come in costume. Special trips to Hogsmeade will be made on Saturday for the students to purchase costumes."

**~**~**~**~**~**

Natasha sat in her quarters. She was trying desperately to fight the cold feeling she had inside but she knew that it would win. It had won with Aubrey and she had known him for years, she and Remus had only been together for a few days. She was terrified that something was going to happen to Remus and it would be her fault. She was so afraid that he would one day disappear and she'd be alone again.

"I can't do this to myself," she said aloud to her empty room. "I can't…I can't get hurt again. What if I lose him like I lost Aubrey and mom and dad? No, I'll just have to stay away from him." She said with conviction, but she didn't want to stay away from him. She wanted to be with him. She wanted to sit in front of a fire with his arms wrapped around her. Why was she making this so hard? Despite what she wanted, despite her feelings for him, Natasha decided that distance was the only answer. She shivered and began to sob as the cold took over. Rising from her seat she dried her eyes and realized that she had a class to teach.

**~**~**~**~**~**

Chapter Eighteen:

What do I have to do?

Remus knew something was wrong the moment Natasha walked into the Great Hall for dinner that night. She had not been at lunch and he heard that she was late to her final Potions Class that afternoon. As she had made a habit of doing she sat to Remus' left and kissed him on the cheek. Today these gestures seemed to be mechanical and Remus shivered when her lips touched his face.

"You're so cold," he observed. The look in her eyes was deep and far away as if she were trying to shut everything and everyone out.

"I'm fine," she said shortly.

"Are you…are you okay?" he asked cautiously.

"Fine."

"You sure?"

"Yes," she said in a singsong tone that made it seem as if she were aggravated.

"Okay," he said. She began to pick at her dinner and Remus realized what was going on.

"Can I talk to you for a minute?" he asked her. She looked at him and for a moment he thought he saw a spark of emotion. If he had it faded in an instant. She silently rose from her seat as did Remus and they walked into the Entrance hall.

"Natasha, why are you doing this?" he asked the moment the doors to the Great Hall had closed behind him.

"Doing what?" she asked emotionlessly.

"You're so cold…it's like you're purposely distancing yourself from me,"

"It's your imagination,"

"No it isn't. Are you angry with me?"

"No."

"Did I do something wrong?"

"No."

"Damn it Natasha!" he said unable to contain his frustration. "What do I have to do to make you happy? What do I have to do to make you understand?"

"Understand what?"

"Understand that I'm not Aubrey,"

"I'm well aware of the fact that you are not Aubrey," she said coldly.

"What do I have to do to make you want to be with me?" he asked in an almost pleading manner.

"You can't _make me do anything," she said._

"What do I have to do to make you love me?"

"You can not force me to do something I don't want to do," she said. She and Remus continued this discussion unaware that they now had an audience. Half of the staff plus the majority of the students were crowded around the door watching them.

"So you don't love me?"

"I didn't…" she began with a sorrowful expression but she stopped. Cold. She had to be cold. "Yes, that's right."

"If you don't love me then tell me what do I have to do," Remus said gulping, "to forget about you?"

"I guess you'll have to figure that one out on your own," she said blinking back tears of anger and frustration as well as sadness. Why was she doing this to him?

"You really are evil aren't you? You're the worst kind of evil. You make people think you're okay and then you sting them like a scorpion. This place is plagued by the poison inside you," Remus said angrily. "I'm not going to put myself through this. If you were just using me…if you just wanted to see if you could finish what Severus started then your mission has been accomplished because you've hurt me more than anyone ever has," he turned angrily prepared to stalk back to his quarters.

"Moony please," she began, her facade crumbling and tears beginning to fall down her face.

"Don't you ever call me that!" he screamed at her and with that he ran down the entrance hall. Natasha did the same and the staff was left wondering how this would all end.

**~**~**~**~**~**

Chapter nineteen:

In too deep

Sirius ran after his best friend. Never before had he seen him look so hurt or angry.

"Remus!" he yelled hoping that he would stop running but he did not. Out of Hogwarts and onto the grounds he ran. Sirius tried in vain to catch him but realized that he was not going to. "Remus stop!" he yelled again but Remus' ears were deaf to his request. He ran until he was deep within the Forbidden Forest. Finally out of breath and feeling as if his legs would give on him he stopped and leaned against a tree. Sirius appeared a few moments later, first as Padfoot, then as himself. Remus fell to his knees and screamed in rage. His roars rang out through the forest and Sirius stared at him in alarm.

"Why is she doing this to me!" he screamed. He looked to Sirius as if he expected him to have the answer.

"Do you think it has to do with Snape really?" Sirius asked.

"No. No I know why this is happening. I should have known this would happen."

"What?"

"I knew it, damn it!"

"You're talking in circles. I can't help you fix it if you don't talk to me,"

"Her dad was a werewolf. He hid it from her mother and entrusted her with the difficult task of locking him up before he changed. She forgot to lock the door one night…because she was sick and her clueless mother had put her to bed early and he got out. Naturally he attacked her mother and then blamed it on her. As if having that weigh on he wasn't enough he shot her mom and himself in front of her. That's why she had to go live with Snape. Then her best friend Aubrey is murdered in what looked to be self-defense because Snape planned on having her become a Death Eater."

"She's scared," Sirius said. "She doesn't want to hurt you,"

"Then why is she doing this!"

"Open your eyes Remus! She's afraid. She's probably petrified. She thinks that if she allows herself to love you something will happen to you."

"I should have seen this coming,"

"Now that we know the problem, it can be fixed,"

"No. No what I said was too cruel," Remus said shaking his head. He began to cry and Sirius blinked in surprise. "I wanted to hurt her the way she was hurting me,"

"I'll help you fix it,"

"No, I'll just let her go. I've come to the conclusion that I'm always going to be alone."

"You love her. You're in too deep to just let her go,"

Remus looked at Sirius with tear filled eyes. "I know," he whispered.

**~**~**~**~**~**

Chapter Twenty:

Afraid

Ginny walked toward Natasha's quarters. Having seen how upset she was Ginny thought that having a girl to talk to may help her. She knocked on the door and a teary eyed Natasha answered it. She said nothing, just left the door open and walked away. Ginny followed her.

"Natasha," Ginny began, "Natasha what happened?"

"I got scared!" she said looking to Ginny. Tears streamed down her face and she did not bother to dry them. "All my life…I've lost so many people to lycanthropy. My father, my mother, my best friend…all gone because they were wolves and they knew me,"

"What do you mean?"

"Dad trusted me to lock the door and I got sick and forgot…he bit mom…he killed himself and mom so I could be normal. So I could go to school and have a normal life. Aubrey. My sweet Aubrey. He was like my brother. I loved him. Dead. Why? Because Severus decided that I was to become a Death Eater and they didn't like wolves. They killed him because they wanted me," she sobbed.

"None of that was your fault," Ginny said soothingly.

"Will you say that if something ever happened to Remus?" Natasha asked. "You can't say you would…I can't let something happen to him, I won't."

"You're afraid to lose him because you love him," Ginny said.

"If you love something set it free, if it comes back to you it's yours," Natasha said sarcastically.

"Oh." Ginny said. Armed with this new information she headed to Remus' quarters hoping to help sort this mess out.

**~**~**~**~**~**

Chapter Twenty-One:

The Plan

Remus and Sirius walked to Remus' quarters. They were not surprised to see Harry, Ron, Neville, Charlie, and Bill standing at the door anxiously awaiting his return.

"Are you okay?" Harry asked. He looked at Remus and said "stupid question,"

"Of course he's not okay," Charlie added.

"Is there anything we can do to help?" Ron asked.

"Not unless you can change the past," Remus said sullenly. He opened the door to his quarters and they all went inside.

"Where's your other half?" Remus asked Neville.

"She went after Natasha," he said frowning.

"Why did you want us to change the past?" Bill asked. "You mean erase today?"

"No." Remus said shaking his head. "This was a situation we couldn't avoid. Natasha's past has been really very hard. She's lost a lot of people to either dark magic or lycanthropy."

"So she's afraid," Ron said softly. Remus nodded.

"I want to fix it but I can't think of any way to go about it. After what I said to her she won't talk to me. She probably won't even come near me."

"It's not as bad as it seems," Harry said trying to reassure Remus.

"I played right into it…she wanted a reason to avoid me and now she has it," Remus said.

"You didn't do it on purpose Moony," Sirius said. "You were angry and frustrated. You were upset. She understands you know she does,"

"How can I fix this?" Remus asked shaking his head. Ron was about to utter a suggestion but Ginny came bursting into the room.

"I've got it!" she said.

"Got what?" the group said in unison.

"A plan. To fix it," she said. "Minerva is throwing that Halloween ball. Well, you can play a romantic song and get her to dance with you,"

"That might work."

"Yeah. We'll dance, we'll kiss, we'll shmooze, we'll carry on, and we'll all go home happy," Remus said sarcastically.

"What do you think?" Ginny asked. "It'll work. I know it will,"

"How will we get her to dance with me?" Remus asked.

"You and Sirius could go as the same thing," Bill suggested.

"Sirius could start off dancing with her, and you could make a switch," Neville finished. After a bit of persuasion Remus agreed.

"The worst that could happen is she'll hate me more,"

So now they had a plan, the question was would it work?

**~**~**~**~**~**

Chapter Twenty-One:

Miserable

The day after the argument was full of tension and anticipation. Remus only attended meals hoping to catch a glimpse of Natasha but to no avail. He overheard one of the students mention that Potions Classes had been let out early and that Natasha looked tired and unhappy.

"Figures this would happen," one of the Gryffindor students said. "I was just beginning to grasp Potions and she has to go and get hung up over some guy,"

Although it was obvious that she was teaching her classes she was not seen by any of the staff members unless it was leaving or entering her classroom or quarters. She ate her meals alone in her room. Remus moped around as if he had lost everything that had ever meant anything to him and it hurt his friends to see him so unhappy.

"Maybe we should go talk to her, get her to at least come to meals," Ron suggested one night to Harry as they lie in bed. Both where worried about Remus and Natasha, and neither one could sleep.

"No. No we are already interfering in this…and with good reason but we don't want to get too involved,"

"You're right," Ron said snuggling up to Harry. "Promise me we'll never fight like this,"

"Not if I can help it," Harry said smiling. Planting a gentle kiss on his lover's lips they held each other as they slept.

**~**~**~**~**~**

Ginny lie in a sleeping Neville's arms. The situation with Natasha and Remus made her realize just how lucky she was to have him. She lovingly gazed upon him and he must have felt her watching him. Opening his eyes he smiled at her.

"It's all going to be okay and we will always be okay," he said to her kissing her quickly on the tip of her nose. Happy with his statement she snuggled her head in the crock of his neck and went back to sleep.

**~**~**~**~**~**

Remus felt as if the week would never end. Halloween was on Sunday and it was only Wednesday. He briefly entertained the idea of canceling classes for the rest of the week. He didn't want to get out of bed, he didn't want to eat, and he could not sleep. He wanted to find Natasha, to fix this, to make it right but he couldn't. Every time he thought about the argument they had he began to cry. Why had he been so cruel? Why had he told her that she was poison and she was like Snape? He closed his eyes as he heard the all too familiar sound of Natasha's sobs carrying through the empty hall.

**~**~**~**~**~**

Natasha lay in her bed. Although she had not slept in days she was wide awake. Part of her wanted to go to Remus and tell him how much she did love him but she kept remembering what he had said. She was like Severus. She had hurt him more than anyone else. He probably hated her. He had said that the poison inside her plagued Hogwarts. Remembering this made her begin to sob and the sound rang out through the empty room and carried through the dungeons. She was so tired. Deciding that Potions Classes would be canceled until after Halloween she rolled over and buried her head in her pillow hoping for sleep but wishing that Remus were with her.

**~**~**~**~**~**

Chapter Twenty-Two

Happy Halloween

It felt as if Halloween would never arrive but finally after what seemed to be an eternity it did. Remus was a nervous wreck and almost backed out of going to the ball all together.

"She didn't even teach classes after Wednesday," Ginny reported. "One of the Ravenclaw girls told Neville that she canceled classes,"

"She's not coming out of her room to do her job what makes you think she's going to show up tonight?" Remus asked. He looked at himself in the mirror. He and Sirius were both dressed in black tuxedos with black Indiana Jones style hats. On the lapel of their jackets was a red rose and to hide their faces they had chosen plain white masks.

"The Phantom of the Opera," Harry mused. He and Ron had opted to go as themselves so they were dressed in formal robes. Ginny and Neville were going to the ball as Guinevere and Lancelot. Charlie would not be attending the ball.

"This is not going to work," Remus said.

"It will if you want it to," Sirius said. "Now, are you ready?" he asked as he slid his mask over his face.

"I suppose," Remus said as he too placed his mask upon his face. Taking a deep breath Remus and his small entourage walked from his quarters to the Great Hall.

**~**~**~**~**~**

Natasha put the finishing touches on her costume. She was going as a gypsy. She had charmed her hair to grow so it now hung just below her shoulders. She tied an elaborately designed blue handkerchief around the front of her hair to hold it back. One piece of hair hung in front of her eyes but she left it go. Her dress, an antique gypsy dress that Severus' mother had given her had a midnight blue bottom and a white top. She tied the lacing in the front and looked at herself in the mirror. Taking a deep breath she headed toward the Great Hall.

**~**~**~**~**~**

Remus stood in the corner of the Great Hall watching for Natasha. When she entered he found it hard for himself to breath. She was beautiful. Everyone stopped to look at her. She was dressed in a blue and white gypsy dress that hung down to her ankles. Plain white sandals adorned her feet and she wore a silver ankle bracelet. Her earrings and bracelet matched the anklet. She forced a smile to her face as she entered. Remus looked to the other side of the room where Sirius stood near the door and nodded once. _Here goes nothing. He thought to himself._

**~**~**~**~**~**

Natasha had no sooner entered the Great Hall than a strange man came up to her and took her hand. He led her to the dance floor and began to dance with her. She could tell right away that it was not Remus. This stranger was about an inch taller and was not as thin as Remus. She pulled away from him but did not run. She scanned the room for Remus and Sirius but could not find them. She spotted Bill, who had come to the ball dressed in nothing but leather. He had with him a whip and some chains. She laughed to herself finding his costume funny. Harry and Ron were standing together at the far end of the room in dress robes. It took her a while to find Ginny and Neville but when she did she could not help but be in awe. Now if only she could find Remus.

**~**~**~**~**~**

Sirius had been dancing with Natasha and realized that she was looking for him and Remus. He wondered if she knew that he was not Remus. As if she had heard his silent question she pulled away from him a bit. Yes, she knew. This was a good sign, at least to Sirius. He began to dance her in the direction of where Remus was standing hoping that the band would play the song he had requested. He was almost in the right spot to change places with Remus. Without warning the lights were dimmed and the band began to play a fast song. Sirius looked over toward the band and saw Minerva. He would have to thank her later. Taking this opportunity to make the switch he spun Natasha around and Remus stepped in to take his place.

**~**~**~**~**~**

After the lights went down the strange person Natasha was dancing with spun her around. When she was facing him again he seemed different. The fast song stopped playing and a slow song began. She thought that he was a bit shorter and thinner than the man she was dancing with. The man instinctively pulled her close to him and she knew in an instant who it was. Smiling to herself she wrapped her arms around his neck. They danced together as if no one else was in the room.

"Hello Remus," she whispered in his ear. She reached up and gently pulled the mask from his face.

"How did you know?" he asked.

"Just by the way you're holding me," she said. "Did you set this up all by yourself?"

"No, Sirius and the rest of them helped,"

"Ah."

"Are you angry?"

"No." Remus was about to say something else but Natasha didn't give him the chance. She stood on her toes and kissed him. Startled he took a step back but returned the kiss and wrapped his arms around her.

"I'm not letting you go again," he whispered to her.

"You won't have to," she said. "I missed you,"

"I missed you too,"

"Let's go outside and talk," she suggested. Remus nodded and they walked toward the door. He glanced over his shoulder to find that Harry, Ron, Bill, Ginny, Neville, and Sirius were all standing together smiling and nodding encouragingly.

**~**~**~**~**~**

Natasha was ecstatic that she was able to look into Remus' eyes again. She missed everything about him. They walked out the door and toward the greenhouses.

"Remus," she began hesitantly. "I…I didn't mean to push you away. I was just afraid,"

"I know," he said. He didn't want to interrupt her.

"Not only was I afraid I was overwhelmed. I've never felt this strongly for anyone ever…not even Aubrey."

"Natasha," he said and he stopped walking. He turned to face her, placing his hands on her arms. "When I'm with you…I can barely breath. Whenever you look at me I feel as if you are reading my soul…that I can say nothing and you understand everything. When you touch me I feel as if the whole world stops…" he stopped and she waited patiently for him to continue. "When you tried to push me away I was terrified that you didn't want me anymore. That you were just trying to finish me off,"

"Remus I would never," she began but stopped when she realized he had more to say.

"I never meant to hurt you by saying such evil things. You are not poison. You are not like Snape. I love you," he finished. Natasha began to cry.

"I never meant to hurt you…I didn't want to make you cry…I tried telling myself that I don't love you…but the truth is I've fallen for you so badly that no matter how much I try to fight it…it always wins. I want to be with you. I want to go to bed with you at night and wake up with you beside me in the morning," she said.

"Your wish is my command," he said. Without warning he scooped her up from the ground and carried her back to his quarters. He carried her to his bedchamber and lay her down on his bed. Crawling into bed beside her he wrapped his arms around her and kissed her passionately. Wrapping him in an embrace she snuggled close to him ready to catch up on some much needed sleep.

"Happy Halloween," she mumbled to him just before she dozed off.

**~**~**~**~**~**

Chapter Twenty-Three:

Happily Ever After

Remus sat up and blinked. At first he thought that the night before had been a dream but Natasha was lying beside him. Her handkerchief headband had come out of her hair sometime during the night and a few strands were on her face. Lovingly he brushed them away and gazed upon her. He felt so lucky. He finally had someone who loved him despite his imperfections, despite the fact that he was a werewolf. She opened her eyes and smiled at him. She reached up and ran her hand through his long velvety brown hair and her eyes expressed more love and contentment than could be described by the best writer in the world. Remus realized in that moment that he would never be alone again, that he had finally managed to fall in love with a girl who loved him because she was able to look past the obvious.


End file.
